Flu Shot
I hate the fact that I had to get a flu shot because I am a possible threat to the rest of his family. Argh. It almost makes me imagine the peace I'd be in had I not been dating anyone right now. Now I remember why I liked being alone. I'm not imposing on anyone else, and they are not imposing on me. Say we are still together a few years from now, perhaps in a place of our own - I will not be getting the flu shot then. I don't care if I have to avoid his family for 6 months.
And today, I got NOTHING DONE. I'm getting kind of behind in school because I seriously cannot study with him. We talk, his house is noisy and uncomfortable, I feel like I can't touch anything because his mom's so paranoid about her table and "good couches" (when the house is in total chaos).
I told him I'd go to school with him tomorrow and study while he was in class. But that means I'll probably end up hanging at his house for the rest of the day, getting nothing done. Again. I think when he calls, I'll tell him I'm staying home. Yeah, my mom bothers the shit out of me, but my productivity is slightly higher with her than it is with him.
I love him but GEEZ am I annoyed right now. I'm PMS'ing, I've got a sore arm from that fucking flu shot that HIS MOTHER insists on because of HIS UNCLE who insists on living with his sister(and I feel like I have no choice because I don't have any plans on leaving him any time soon). I got no homework done in the passed two days because I've been at his house. We have not walked for almost a week. It's just like, I can't live like this for the rest of my life, if that is where this is going. I cannot imagine myself feeling like this until I die. For God's sake, I need some say in my own fucking life. I realize I am essentially a part of his family circle for the time being and my being sick, or making him walk with me everyday even if he's got work to do, my accidental non-care of his mothers furniture, will have an effect on them.
About his homework. We don't walk much now because we both have alot of homework. He's taking one class and I'm taking 4. I still find the time to walk and he can't. ARGHHHHH. PLUS, I'm pretty much his math tutor this semester. The more I read this entry the more I'm starting to see the big picture.
"We are such a great couple because neither of us is selfish," says he. Well, I'm not. But I feel like I'm paying more of a price than he is. I mean, I got a lot more homework. I pick up his dinner kinda often on the way to his house, I take him home from school, I help with his math, I even got a fucking shot I don't think I'll need for the next 30 years so his family would not get sick because of me, I spend a heck of a lot of time at his house (in his words, I keep his mother away from him), I work my study around him, I don't complain about our sex life either. I feel very imposed on. Very.
I'm asking for some more walking, some more quiet time so I can fucking concentrate on my own damn work, some more self-discipline on his part, and some concern about MY opinion.
And today, I got NOTHING DONE. I'm getting kind of behind in school because I seriously cannot study with him. We talk, his house is noisy and uncomfortable, I feel like I can't touch anything because his mom's so paranoid about her table and "good couches" (when the house is in total chaos).
I told him I'd go to school with him tomorrow and study while he was in class. But that means I'll probably end up hanging at his house for the rest of the day, getting nothing done. Again. I think when he calls, I'll tell him I'm staying home. Yeah, my mom bothers the shit out of me, but my productivity is slightly higher with her than it is with him.
I love him but GEEZ am I annoyed right now. I'm PMS'ing, I've got a sore arm from that fucking flu shot that HIS MOTHER insists on because of HIS UNCLE who insists on living with his sister(and I feel like I have no choice because I don't have any plans on leaving him any time soon). I got no homework done in the passed two days because I've been at his house. We have not walked for almost a week. It's just like, I can't live like this for the rest of my life, if that is where this is going. I cannot imagine myself feeling like this until I die. For God's sake, I need some say in my own fucking life. I realize I am essentially a part of his family circle for the time being and my being sick, or making him walk with me everyday even if he's got work to do, my accidental non-care of his mothers furniture, will have an effect on them.
About his homework. We don't walk much now because we both have alot of homework. He's taking one class and I'm taking 4. I still find the time to walk and he can't. ARGHHHHH. PLUS, I'm pretty much his math tutor this semester. The more I read this entry the more I'm starting to see the big picture.
"We are such a great couple because neither of us is selfish," says he. Well, I'm not. But I feel like I'm paying more of a price than he is. I mean, I got a lot more homework. I pick up his dinner kinda often on the way to his house, I take him home from school, I help with his math, I even got a fucking shot I don't think I'll need for the next 30 years so his family would not get sick because of me, I spend a heck of a lot of time at his house (in his words, I keep his mother away from him), I work my study around him, I don't complain about our sex life either. I feel very imposed on. Very.
I'm asking for some more walking, some more quiet time so I can fucking concentrate on my own damn work, some more self-discipline on his part, and some concern about MY opinion.
posted by mythreefeet at
1:20 AM
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